Skills that Teens Need for Adulthood and How to Help
Social Media and the Unexpected Effects It’s Having on Adolescents
Social Media Benefits
Before we discuss the negative outcomes of these social applications, we should acknowledge the positives. The media allows teens to:
- Broaden social networks from all over the world
- Express themselves creatively and authentically
- Connect them with resources and communities with similar interests
- Entertainment and distractions
- Expose themselves to current events
Social media has indeed accomplished the goal it was originally trying to achieve, however there were some unexpected consequences along the way.
Social Media Harms
As these platforms continue to increase in popularity, the unexpected negative effects are also growing, especially with teenagers.
Bullying and Rumors
Name-calling and rumor-spreading have always been an unfortunate issue during the adolescent period. With social media however, it’s much easier to engage with the harassment. Being bullied online, also known as cyberbullying, is an issue that only continues to get worse over time.
Perpetrators are able to remain anonymous if they want, making rude comments and posting discriminating content. It happens frequently due to the harassment taking place virtually rather than face to face. It feels safer to jump on the bandwagon when there’s a screen to hide behind.
Distractions
While distractions are helpful every once in a while, it is possible that these distractions turn into all-around avoidance. Scrolling, posting, watching, and reading social media websites can become addictive. We would much rather watch a humorous video on TikTok or Snapchat than take care of responsibilities. Media is so easily accessible that it makes procrastination tendencies much worse.
Peer Pressure
It is common to feel pressure from social media to conform to the ways other people look and act. Influencers are individuals who use social media to inspire a specific population. They often use good looks and fun personalities to gain followers.
As impressionable as teenagers are, they might start to change the way they dress or engage with different interests simply because someone they follow online is doing the same. Influencers with a massive following can even start “trends” that instantly become popular. If teens desire to fit in, they may start to join in on these trends.
Unrealistic Expectations
Social media promotes a distorted view on life, whether that’s looks and appearances, professional aspirations, relationships, or experiences. People only tend to post about the positives in their life, wanting to show off their new partner, job, or share about their trip abroad. Rarely do we see people post about all the negatives happening to them.
We start to feel bad about ourselves, wondering why we can’t look like this person or have a happy relationship like that person. Why can’t you afford a trip to Italy, but someone you used to go to high school with can? With all the filters, fake smiles, and editing, social media is causing more harm than good.
What Can Parents Do?
One of the main ways parents can support their teen is to properly educate them about the media. Having conversations about peer pressure, unrealistic expectations, and distractions can be beneficial for adolescents to hear. It will allow them to continue using social media for the benefits, but being cautious about the harms.
If you notice your child experiencing negative effects from the use of social media, it may be beneficial to seek help from a mental health professional. Counselors can help support parents with monitoring the use of the media, while also helping the child understand the dangers of engaging with these platforms too much. Reach out and schedule a session today!
How to Spot Depression in Teenage Boys
Physical Signs
When we think of depression, we mainly think of low energy, depressed mood, and feelings of hopelessness. However, depression in teenage boys can manifest as physical symptoms as well.
- Not taking care of personal hygiene. This could look like refusing to bathe or shower, wearing the same clothes, or failing to use deodorant. Once in a while is normal, but constantly having to remind your son to wash his face or brush his teeth could be a warning sign.
- Headaches, body pains, and stomach issues with unexplained causes. Suppressing or ignoring depression symptoms can cause tension in the body that may present as muscle or joint pain.
- Eating too much or too little. Again, this can be normal teenage behavior, but it is important to keep an eye on his eating habits.
- Oversleeping and low energy. It’s one thing if your teen is staying up late to talk to friends or play games, but it is another if he’s getting enough rest and still feeling fatigued. The same could be said for not being able to sleep. Insomnia is also an indicator of depression.
Behavioral Signs
Behavior signs are easy to ignore, especially if they are excused as being a normal teenage boy. However, these can be an indication of something more serious.
- Mood swings and emotional outbursts. Extreme highs and lows can mean more than just hormonal changes. Depression can also present as anger or irritation over seemingly small things. It can also be difficult to calm himself down once emotions are high.
- Being unable to focus. Teens may start to forget to do daily tasks, lose concentration at school, and struggle with decision-making. This could impact his overall wellbeing and problem-solving skills.
- Withdrawing from social activities, extracurriculars, and pleasurable hobbies that they use to love can be a major sign of depression in boys. He may start to spend more time in his room and stop engaging with friends and family.
- Lower self-esteem and feelings of worthlessness may start to increase. Your son may start to dwell on past mistakes associated with feelings of guilt and shame. He also may start to develop a negative view of himself.
- Taking risks. Teens may start to make bad choices, ignore responsibilities, and avoid consequences. Risky behavior can range anywhere from smoking and drinking to sneaking and staying out past curfew.
How Can Parents Help?
As caregivers, it is important to not ignore these signs and symptoms, but rather encourage communication. You may receive some push back from your son on talking about feelings, but just reassure him you are there for love and support. Remember, it can be easy to blame all of this on normal hormonal changes or teenage behavior, but they are also major signs of depression.
If these symptoms start to increase, it may be time to reach out to a mental health professional. Counselors could be a great resource to learn about depression in teens, as well as creating a safe and welcoming environment for your son to work through negative thoughts and feelings. It may be beneficial to attend some sessions with your teen to show support and help him realize that he is not alone. Reach out and schedule a consultation today!
Ways in Which Teen Brains Are Different
Brains continue to grow and develop throughout childhood and even into adulthood. Because of this, children and adults differ in the ways they act, problem-solve, and make decisions. Here are 5 ways that teen brains are different than adults.
1. Differing Priorities
Our brain stops fully developing in our twenties — the prefrontal cortex being one of the last places to mature. This area is responsible for decision-making, planning, and prioritizing. Teens tend to focus more on building relationships and social experiences.
They prioritize friends, and with the prefrontal cortex still developing, teens are more likely to take risks due to the social benefits rather than think about consequences. They cannot always understand their reasonings behind behaviors or actions.
2. Ready to Learn
Because of the continuous development, teen’s brains are able to adapt and learn about new experiences. They can also gain skills easier and balance multiple tasks at once. It is important for teens to find stimulation in order to release stress and improve their cognitive abilities.
Enforcing education, such as encouraging teens to take challenging classes, helps promote brain maturity. Creative activities that involve art or music also strengthen brain circuits and aid with healthy development. The adolescent brain can actually change and adapt better than the adult brain.
3. Stress Response
Stress is challenging to manage for anyone, but teens tend to respond differently than adults. One reason is that their emotional regulation is not as strong, therefore making it more difficult for them to utilize skills to calm themselves down. They are also more likely to perceive stress as dangerous and act out in response.
Teenagers can be more susceptible to drug and alcohol abuse, aggression, physical illness, or social isolation if they do not learn effective management or coping skills.
4. Susceptible to Mental Illness
Due to the stresses of the adolescent period, it is common for teens to struggle with their mental health. The more risk factors teenagers are exposed to, the more likely they are to be diagnosed with a mental disorder. These factors may include:
- Pressure to conform
- Bullying or discrimination
- Physical or sexual abuse
- Neglect
- Exposure to violence
- Lack of support
- Family history
5. Resilient
Despite the many challenges adolescents face, they are more likely to bounce back and live relatively normal lives. Experiences and changes in the brain during this period may contribute to resilience and an improved mental health into adulthood. Teenagers also have more brain cells than adults; they are quicker, meaning they can bounce back easier from impactful situations.
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Adolescents have the ability to live in the moment, which us adults may want to try more. While this can be a pro and a con, teens can use this to include more joy in their daily lives. Living in the moment allows them to discover their passions, identities, and goals. They take life day by day, challenge their thinking processes, and explore career options.
Understanding the teen brain proves to be challenging, but imagine trying to deal with the development. At one point in time, we were all adolescents going through our own brain changes. This time period can be difficult, and if you notice your teen struggling with their mental health, it may be time to reach out to a mental health professional.
Counselors can guide teens to understand their development while helping them learn effective skills for emotional regulation, stress management, and communication. Reach out and schedule their first session today!
Social Media: How It Affects Adolescent Mental Health
Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter, Tik Tok… Social media has quickly become a primary method of communication for all ages. We are all subjected to scrolling, liking, and posting — teenagers especially. Like anything, there are pros and cons to the use of social media. Both impact the well-being of adolescent’s mental health.
Benefits of Social Media
- Building social networks: Having access to a wide variety of different online groups can help broaden social supports. Some teens find comfort in engaging with online communities where it’s easier to find individuals with similar likes and interests. It also helps geographical barriers and fosters relationships with people overseas.
- Entertainment: It’s no question that social media has been the cause of some pretty hilarious viral videos over the years. Social media that’s humorous and distracting can help improve adolescent’s moods.
- Self-expression: Media platforms can allow teens to express their interests, tap into their creative side, or share personal content.
Harms of Social Media
- Bullying: One of the largest criticisms of social media is how it can be used to harass people anonymously. Bullying is common amongst social groups during the adolescent stage of life. With access to social media, it makes the name-calling, teasing, and rumor spreading that much easier. This is a large contributor to increased symptoms of anxiety and depression in teens.
- Low self-esteem: Another issue with social media is its ability to promote unrealistic views and expectations. With filters, photoshop, and editing, people post videos and photos that appear flawless. Teenagers struggle with body image and how they view themselves, and seeing these types of posts online will only add to these negative feelings.
- Distractions: Sometimes these are needed after a long day or a stressful situation. However, excessive use can become a problem, and even an addiction. Relying on the media for satisfaction can be a slippery slope into developing anxiety and depression.
Long-Term Effects
Unfortunately, the cons outweigh the pros when it comes to social media. One negative impact is the issue with indirect communication. A lot of adolescent’s free time are spent browsing media and texting. FaceTime or video chat is becoming more popular than hanging out face-to-face.
There is a sense of protection behind a screen, and it can be almost anxiety-inducing to communicate to others directly. We, as humans, are reliant on social cues to help navigate conversations. With technology being a main source of communication, teens and adolescents are not developing critical social skills that may be needed in adulthood.
Mental health is also largely impacted by social media. Due to lower self-esteem, cyberbullying, and decrease of social interactions, anxiety and depression have spiked in the adolescent population. Teenage years are challenging to begin with, and with the added stresses and pressure of the media, mental health symptoms are increasing.
What Can Parents Do?
There are steps to take to promote healthy social media use and how to educate your teen on the negative impacts.
- Set limits: Only allow a certain amount of time for social media use. Encourage use for only a few hours a day and do not let it interfere with daily activities, school, work, or sleep.
- Monitor their accounts: Check in with your child about what they are posting and who they are communicating with.
- Encourage direct communication: Explain the importance of socializing face-to-face and help them understand the dangers of constantly talking to others via the media.
- Talk about the positives and negatives of social media: It’s important to have an open and honest conversation about the dangers of social media. Educate them about caring for themselves and their mental well-being.
If you notice negative signs and symptoms due to media, it may be best to reach out to mental health professional for help. Contact us today to schedule your first session.
4 Common Causes of Teenage Anxiety
Today, there are many different factors as to why teens are more likely to develop anxiety than there were 30 years ago. The development of technology, more emphasis on academic success, and societal pressures — to name a few. As adults, we may not be able to understand the reasons behind a teenagers’ anxiety. Below is a list of 4 common causes of teenage anxiety, and how to support these kids through the challenges of adolescence.
1. High Expectations
In the academic world today, there is a lot more pressure to do well in school and move on to higher education. Colleges are competitive, and it can be an added challenge to try and find a job right out of high school with no experience. More teenagers today have part-time jobs and are engaged in extracurricular activities at school, all while trying to maintain good grades and a social life. These expectations can leave teens feeling stressed with little to no time to decompress and take time to relax.
2. Hormones and Brain Development
The life stage of adolescence is a monumental time for growth and development. Hormones are flowing, bodies are changing, and this can cause a lot of emotional reactions. Teenagers may feel a variety of emotions such as anger, depression, and anxiety — for seemingly no reason.
The range of emotions felt is likely due to the hormonal fluctuations. During this time period, their brain is also still developing. They are learning what it means to be an “adult” and take on more responsibility, while also trying to balance and understand the meaning of emotions. This can cause a lot of stress on an adolescent, and in turn, cause anxiety symptoms.
3. Peer Pressure
Friendships, social identities, and trying to “fit in” puts a lot of pressure on teenagers. Peer pressure can be positive or negative, both equally as stressful. Teenagers want to find their place and form connections with others. This may cause them to conform and act a certain type of way, perhaps contradicting the way in which the child normally acts.
Another form of anxiety can come from dreading social interactions with others. Whether it’s caused by bullying, or just feeling like they don’t belong, social anxiety is extremely common during the adolescent period. Some kids may just be more shy than others. It does not mean they are necessarily anxious, they just need more comfortability while socializing. The pressure of feeling like they need to make friends, however, may also cause some anxiety.
4. Parental and Caregiver Relationships
Teenagers are at that stage of life where they are torn between wanting their parents or caregivers approval, as well as wanting to rebel against them. This can cause strain on both sides of the relationship. Parents and caregivers will discipline and correct behavior often during this stage, which comes across as disapproval to teens. Feeling like they have disappointed their caregivers, teenagers may feel some stress and anxiety. They are just figuring out their place in society, and eventually will grow out of feeling rebellious.
How to Manage Teenage Anxiety
It’s important for caregivers to validate and listen to their teen when they’re experiencing anxiety. Ask questions, be supportive, and help the child problem-solve. Encourage communication, a healthy diet and exercise, engaging with social supports, and pleasurable activities. Reassure them that they are not alone and help them find coping skills or relaxation techniques to help with anxiety.
One of the best ways to manage teenage anxiety is to get them in touch with a mental health professional. Counseling provides a safe space for teens to understand and overcome their anxiety. Caregivers may be present during these sessions as well to be included in the healing process. Schedule a consultation today, and help your teen find ways to calm the relentless anxieties.
4 Ways to Motivate an Unmotivated Teen
Teenagers tend to get stereotyped for sometimes being “lazy.” They want to stay up late and sleep in, spend their weekends playing video games during the day and hanging out with friends at night, and maintain a diet of ramen noodles and hot Cheetos.
While that might be an exaggeration and certainly isn’t true for every teen, most parents understand that it’s normal for their teenager to be a bit unmotivated from time to time.
But there’s a difference between occasional laziness and a genuinely unmotivated teen. If your teenager never wants to do anything, they don’t show ambition for getting a job, they’re struggling in school, and their relationships are starting to suffer, it could be a bigger problem than you originally thought.
Thankfully, you can motivate your unmotivated teen with a few effective strategies.
1. Be a Good Role Model
It might seem like your teenager is never watching you for advice, but they are. They’re paying closer attention than you might think.
So, be an active role model when it comes to getting things done — even when you don’t necessarily feel all that motivated yourself. Have a positive attitude about things like going to work, doing chores around the home, or even spending time with friends and family.
You are still the best role model your teen could possibly have. Seeing how you handle everyday life and the attitude you have as you tackle your responsibilities can inspire them to be the same way.
2. Notice the Positive Things
It’s hard for anyone to feel motivated when they don’t feel like what they’re doing is “worth it.” Take the time to notice the positive things your teenager does and point them out. That’s especially true for small things.
Maybe your teenager took out the trash without being asked. Say something like, “I noticed you took the trash outside to the bin, and I really appreciate that.” It might be a small chore, but that recognition will likely make them want to do it again in the future.
3. Develop an Understanding
There could be something deeper going on that’s causing your teen’s lack of motivation. Don’t hesitate to get to the bottom of it, if possible.
That doesn’t mean you have to nag or criticize them to get to the root cause. Instead, seek to understand what they might be going through. Maybe they’re struggling with some issues at school or within their friend circles. Maybe they’re worried about the future.
If you think their lack of motivation could be stemming from something else, talk to them. Everyone wants to be heard and understood. It just might take a little extra encouragement for your teen to open up.
4. Motivate Them with Their Interests
You know your teenager better than anyone. If they’re struggling to stay motivated, try starting small by encouraging them with things they already enjoy or are interested in. If they’ve had a certain hobby for years, support it.
For example, if your teen has always had a love of music, encourage them to get more involved by showing your own interest. That could include anything from going to a record store together to buying them a new instrument. When you’re able to plant small seeds that fuel their interests, the motivation they have for that passion can seep out into other areas of life.
Seeing your teen struggle with motivation isn’t always easy. But taking the time to help them as much as possible can make a difference in that struggle. Give these tips a try and keep communication with your teenager open so you’ll always have an understanding of how they’re feeling and what they’re going through.
If nothing else, don’t be afraid to encourage them to reach out and seek support through our teen counseling program. Together, we can help them get to the bottom of why they are struggling to stay motivated.